Family mediation is a structured, voluntary process in which a neutral third party (the mediator) helps family members discuss issues, identify concerns, explore options, and potentially reach agreements.
The mediator does not decide who is right or wrong. Instead, they facilitate communication and negotiation.
Key characteristics include:
Neutrality: The mediator does not take sides.
Self-determination: The participants make the decisions, not the mediator.
Confidentiality: Discussions are generally private, subject to legal exceptions.
Problem-solving focus: The goal is to address practical issues and future arrangements.
Flexibility: Solutions can often be tailored more creatively than a court order.
What Family Mediation Isn’t
It is not therapy
A mediator is not acting as a therapist.
While emotions often arise during mediation, the goal is not to treat psychological issues, heal trauma, or repair relationships. The focus is on resolving disputes and making decisions.
It is not marriage counseling
Marriage counseling seeks to improve or preserve a relationship.
Family mediation can occur whether parties want to stay together, separate, divorce, co-parent, or simply resolve a specific family conflict.
It is not legal representation
A mediator does not advocate for either party.
Even when the mediator is a lawyer, they are not serving as either participant’s attorney. Parties may still obtain independent legal advice.
It is not arbitration
In arbitration, a neutral decision-maker typically hears evidence and imposes a decision.
In mediation, participants retain control over whether an agreement is reached and what it contains.
It is not a courtroom
Mediation is generally collaborative rather than adversarial.
There are no witnesses being cross-examined, no judge issuing rulings, and no “winning” or “losing” in the traditional sense.